Wednesday, November 9, 2011

In memory of Janice...who moved my soul.

This blog was written September 10,2011. Janice died this morning. I cherish this memory of my friend..when she truly was flying like a bird!


This quote ran through my mind last night. I was sitting in a century-old greenhouse with candles in the window sills, oriental rugs on the floor and colorful old light bulbs strung across the wall. It was a perfect place to be...well worth the hour train and bus ride from our home to this out of the way Berlin spot. My friend had invited me there and she was so happy we had come to hear her sing in front of an audience for the first time.
I love this friend. We met a year ago and I knew she must be going through chemo from her scarf-wrapped head. It has been a tough time for her...but as she sang I could see her joy..

"Sun in the sky you know how I feel
Breeze driftin' on by you know how I feel"


She was so happy…and I cried. I knew too much..I knew how she has suffered from chemo, the setbacks and now the cancer is back once again.

"It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me


And I'm feeling good"

And for that moment she was feeling good. And I was so glad I was there. But I felt sad, too...and wondered why I was so lucky. So lucky to have the life I have. Why she, at 45 has this horrible disease, two young children...why why why...
"Fish in the sea you know how I feel
River running free you know how I feel
Blossom in the trees you know how I feel"






And she kept singing, and the saxaphone played and I bet even the sunfowers outside were even listening.

"Dragonflies out in the sun you know what I mean, don't you know
Butterflies all havin' fun you know what I mean
Sleep in peace when the day is done"


I think she is brave. Facing what she knows and hoping for an outcome which will allow her to see her children grow up.

"Stars when you shine you know how I feel
Scent of the pine you know how I feel
Oh freedom is mine

And I know how I feel"

Tomorrow at work she will be there smiling, helping the endless line of students and parents and teachers who all need her. I will see her fatigue...she will share her pain with me and we will hug.

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